Paul's Prayer for a Deeper Experience of Christ

At present, the churches in Alcester Minster are doing a series on St. Paul's letter to the Ephesians. Last week, Adrian Guthrie preached on the reconciliation that comes through Christ as explored in the previous chapter of Paul's letter; on how Christians are being built together as one body to create a single nation, family, building and entity in which God dwells by his Holy Spirit; and how the need for reconciliation with God and one another is as relevant to our minster church, as it was for the Ephesians almost 2,000 years ago.
 

In this morning's passage, Paul writes that he is moved to prayer for the Ephesians. I find it interesting that Paul chooses to include his prayer into this part of his letter. It's a little counter intuitive to our sense of order. In the modern world, we are quite used to having set moments for prayer... We begin and end meetings with prayer and we have special slots in our services for our prayers of supplication, but here... Paul just stops in mid sentence and drops to his knees in prayer, before carrying on in the letter.

I think for Paul, prayer was as much a part of the conversation as the rest of his dialogue... and if the Holy Spirit tapped him on the shoulder in the midst of what he was doing, then engaged God in prayer with regard to whatever was on his heart. This morning I'd like to explore three questions with regards to Paul's prayer for the Ephesians... and demonstrate why it is so important to us in developing as spiritually well rounded individuals, as An effectively functioning and growing minster, and as a true family of Christian brothers and sisters in the universal Church. I'll be looking at what things Paul prayed for; why Paul prayed for those things, and why Paul was confident
in his prayers for those things.

So what exactly did Paul pray for?
 

Verse 15 tells us that Paul prayed for the Ephesians for the following things:

1. That they may be strengthened with power through his Spirit in their inner beings
2. That they may have power together with all the Lord's holy people.

On the surface that looks like he's asked God for the same thing, the same power twice, but I don't think that's the case. You see, in the first instance Paul has asked that the Ephesians are filled inwardly as individuals. In the second instance God has asked that they be filled with power together with all God's people as a collective. Paul is stressing the need for God to play an active role in both our personal lives and public fellowship.

3. That they may know Christ's love that surpasses knowledge...

That seems a bit odd too, doesn't it? If something surpasses knowledge... How can we know it? Isn't that a paradox?

I don't believe it is a paradox. Knowledge of the facts is one thing, but living in the truth of those facts is quite different. Reading a book about Michelangelo will tell you a lot of information about what the composition of his work. But it won't tell you what it feels like to stand in the Sistine chapel and take in all the sights, sounds and smells.
 

You can know what the concept of love is, but that's not the same as knowing the love of another person.

To know something in a way that surpasses knowledge requires that we connect with the subject of our knowledge and let that take us on a journey. Here on Earth we cannot fully know God... he's too big...
 

But we can know what it is like to live in the fullness of God.

The second question I wanted to ask, was why did Paul pray for the Ephesians.

Well he prayed that they would be strengthened inwardly, so that Christ would dwell in their hearts through faith. The more time we make for God in our lives through prayer and meditation, reading the Bible and through fellowship with one another), the more our gaze is turned towards him and the stronger our relationship with him grows. Paul wants us to put our roots down deeply... as he words it, to be established in love.
 

This flows into the next reason that Paul prayed his prayer because the more deeply rooted in God we are as individuals, the more that benefits the Church.

Paul also prayed because he wanted the Church to truly understand how much Christ loves it.

When we see God at work in one life... be it our own, or another person's... it is invigorating and life changing. But when people see God at work in the life of a church or a community... that's when renewal or even revival happens!

As an example, did you know that there is a type of heat resistant grass that thrives in volcanic soil? However it can only do this because of a fungus that lives on it, that protects it. But scientists have discovered that the fungus itself can only survive because it too has a heat resistant virus living inside of it.

In this respect, God is like the virus, we are like the fungus and the church is like the grass. The more we experience God personally and the more we share God in fellowship with one another, the more the church thrives.

"Panic grass" grows in the geothermal soils of Yellowstone Park in America. It can only do this because of the protection afforded to it by a fungus, which in turn is protected by a virus. This to me illustrates how the Holy Spirit strengthens individuals in a hostile environment, and how a fellowship of these Spirit filled individuals in turn generate the right conditions for renewal and revival.

The third reason Paul prayed the prayer is because he wanted his readers to be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.

I was saying earlier about the difference between knowledge of a person and knowing a person on a personal level... and this here is what Paul reinforces - know God cram as much of him into your life as you can! Jesus said to the apostles in John's gospel that:

"I no longer call you servants, because a servant does not know his master's business.
Instead I have called you friends, for everything, for everything that I learned from my Father I have made known to you."

 Paul is reminding us that this offer is extended to all who follow Jesus, not just his apostles. Some people get uncomfortable with the idea of Jesus being a friend... It seems disrespectful, but it is important to remember that Jesus being a friend to us, does not negate him being our master either. The difference is that Jesus is running a family business and not a faceless corporation.

Which brings us to the final question. Why was Paul confident in his prayer?
 

I believe the answer is because, knowing and experiencing God in his own life, in the ways we have explored this morning, he *knew* that God *is* able to do immeasurably more than we ask or imagine.

I just love the magnitude of those words. Immeasurably - beyond our ability to calculate.
More than all we ask or imagine - beyond the scope of things we can even conceive.
 

God is limitless.
 

And the wonderful thing is that God's limitless power and resources aren't just something that he dispenses from on high, but verse 20 tells us that this power is at work within us.
 

His power is at work within us. What a privilege

And so if Ephesians 2 last week told us where we need to go in terms of Christ reconciling us to one another in the church, the minster and the communities we live in, then this morning essentially tells us how we are getting there.
 

I have to confess that this short passage is one of my favourite scriptures, and I often use it as a model for prayer when taking part in some kind of mission. Let me finish by praying these words:

Heavenly Father, this morning we pray that out of your glorious riches that you may strengthen us with power through your Spirit in our inner being, so that Christ may dwell in our hearts through faith. And we pray that we, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that we may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God. 20 Now to you who are able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to your power that is at work within us, to you be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever!

Amen.

The Cathedral & The Crucible

Due to my inability to book holiday without procrastination I've been able to benefit from a fair bit of time off in recent days and as luck would have it, it transpired that events had unfolded to provide me with a unique opportunity.

 

Justin Welby - The new Archbishop of Canterbury, has been progressing through the country on a prayer pilgrimage ahead of his enthronement on the 21st March 2013. The second sojourn of his journey led him back to Coventry - the diocese where he had spent roughly 15 years of ministry, culminating in his tenure as Sub Dean and Canon for Reconciliation Ministry.

 

Having the day off on Friday, I decided to take part in the event - both the church I worship at and the church I grew up in  are part of the Diocese of Coventry and its cathedral is therefore in "old money" terms, my mother church. I decided that I was going to make as much of a day of it as I could and found myself strolling into Broadgate at the early hour of 8:30am. As I was early I wandered back and forth, to and fro as the market was being set up and the PA system was being rigged for the welcome address. I approached some local dignitaries... who promptly backed off, apparently intimidated- maybe it was a bad idea for a 6'4" leviathan to wear a hoodie, or maybe they were just picking up on some kind of Alcestrian aura emanating from me.

 

Drummers Leading Archbishop Justin to the Cathedral.

Eventually the Archbishop arrived and after a meet and greet with the local media followed by a welcome by Coventry's mayor and a brief prayer of blessing, those of us who had gathered made our way to the ruins of the old cathedral... led by some drummers. As we arrived, it became apparent that larger throng had gathered outside the cathedral and together we prayed through the Litany of Reconciliation.  Following this we all made our way into the cathedral, which had been divided up into a series of 9 prayer areas with different formats for different people to use.

 

I love Coventry Cathedral; for those of you who don't know, it is a relatively new building that is nestled among the ruins of its predecessor... which was devastated during the destruction of Coventry by the Luftwaffe. I like the distribution of stained glass windows... on the inside it looks very much like something that you might expect to find on the Minbari homeworld in Babylon 5.  I'm also extremely fond of the star and circular shaped chapels at each end. When you look back from the nave, the entrance window is filled with frosted figures of angels and saints that seem to hover above the ruins... keeping watch over the cathedral and the city.

 

Praying Amidst the Ruins of the Old Cathedral

As previously mentioned, I was there for the whole event and decided to work my way around the various stations as best I could... and aside from praying for the Archbishop made the day something of a prayer retreat... something I haven't done for a good while. Being fond of Celtic expressions of prayer, I made my way to the round Chapel of Christ the Servant. and sat there working through a few prayers.  I must have looked a little odd because I'd taken my shoes off... it's a biblical practice that I've adopted when seeking a deeper focus in prayer... and I guess I've picked it up off my old vicar, Steve Burch. Straight away I felt my thoughts being tugged towards issues that periodically cycle from latency to active burden in my heart. I felt very much hemmed in and awestruck.

 

Following this period, I made my way to a Powerpoint station which split the Lord's Prayer up in segments with a particular focus for each line... designed to take 15 minutes to work through. I then made my way down the nave and bumped into some folk from my hometown. I chatted with them briefly and tried not to draw too much attention to my shoeless condition (no luck there), I then made my way to a Labyrinth that had been laid out in the centre of the nave. Funnily enough, this actually required me to be shoeless and having read through the gist of the prayer format, I started out. It was not to be however, as I was yanked out by one of the people from Alcester because the hourly prayer led by Archbishop Justin was starting. I know he thought he was doing the right thing... but I was seriously getting in the zone and it disrupted me - he should have left me to it really... but never mind. A bit like not being able to get back to sleep having been woken by something, I joined the other people in the nave and prayed the hourly prayer.

 

Once this was finished, I made my way back to the Labyrinth... and what followed was by far and away the most profound experience in my day. The idea is that you make your way along a winding path towards the centre and eventually out along another path. There are stations along the route and there are no dead ends. After a period of focused reflection I made my way inward - the first part of which invited me to invoke God's mercy. Gradually I made my way along until I came to the Ignatian Examen... which had some techniques based on a paraphrase of Isaiah 48:

 

Come near and listen to this:
from the beginning I have never spoken to you obscurely,
and all the time these things have been happening, I have been present
Thus says Yahweh, your redeemer, the Holy One:
I, your God, teach you what is good for you,
I lead you in the way that you must go.
If only you had been alert...

 

The meditation required me to examine which part of the text jumped out most vividly to me (I've highlighted what I experienced for you). I felt extremely challenged by this... I'm very guilty of being the kind of Christian who looks for signs and desires wisdom before committing to a path... and I felt that I was being advised that I already know what I need to know... the silence that I have assumed to be in place... has not been real at all.  When you reach the centre of the Labyrinth, you are supposed to just get comfortable and allow God to have you... and not do it at "drive-through" pace... but to be still and wait for God.

 

The final station I came to as I was working my way out, was a biblical meditative vision quest; I'm very fond of these... and I think people should be aware they exist, because they are a powerful area of spirituality that largely remain untapped in the Western church while people flock to similar such things that are available from the more questionable sources in Eastern mysticism.

 

The passage used was the account of Jesus appearing to disciples on the Road to Emmaus. It invited me to breathe the air, to hear the dusty road beneath my feet, to see the hooded stranger and to communicate with him and talk about the kind of feelings that were associated with the people in the passage. I remember very strongly at the end of this meditation seeing Jesus give a wry smile and a wink before vanishing. I felt his reassurance and that he was filling me with hope for the road ahead.

 

As I drew to the end of the Labyrinth, a period of contemplative worship was being performed by a man called Jimmy Lawrence. I felt deeply moved and sang along solemnly. This drew  the next hour to a close and we prayed again with Archbishop Justin.

 

For the next hour I kept drifting towards the accompanied prayer area... but there never seemed to be anyone to pray with. I felt like I could have done with that at that time.  so for the next hour I sat and gazed at the baptistery window in silent contemplation.

 

Eventually hunger got the better of me and I made my way down to the refectory to grab some sustenance. As there were no empty tables, I found myself talking to one of the cathedral chaplains and a visiting couple. Halfway into our chat, the old lady asked me if I was a vicar. I said that no, I wasn't... and I had a familiar strange feeling in the pit of my stomach.

 

Just before 2.00pm I returned for the final hour of prayer and after Archbishop Justin had prayed with us... I decided with a small group of others to go forward and meet him.  Upon greeting him, I took the opportunity to pray over him for his ministry and he in turn prayed for me.  Following this I tied a prayer to the prayer tree and submitted some prayers to the prayer text service that was scrolling on a screen on the right of the cathedral.

 

It was an amazing experience. I truly feel God took a cacophony of emotions and experiences and forged them into something immensely powerful and awe inspiring.

 

I also think I know what that feeling I get when people ask me *that* question, is about.

 

It's embarrassment. I feel it may be akin to the feelings that Peter must have felt when people asked him if he was one of Christ's disciples in the early hours of Good Friday.

 

I think that gives me something really challenging to look at.... and requires me to act perhaps more swiftly than I might appreciate.

 

All in all, my time at the cathedral felt very much akin to being in a crucible.

 

Assuming the Mantle

It's that time of year again...

The 6th of December is the feast day of my namesake - Saint Nicholas of Myra. Of course most of you will know him much better under a different name - Santa Claus. I've often quipped that Santa is very real and exists all over the planet wherever there is a Christian going by the name of Nicholas (Santa derives from the word saint which in the non canonical sense simply means any follower of  Jesus Christ and Claus derives from Nicholas).  So if you apply the laws of lateral thinking... I *AM* Santa Claus.

Please keep this secret between us.

St. Nicholas is a patron saint of a wide variety of odd and peculiar things such causes as:

Greece, Russia, The Netherlands, Liverpool, Portsmouth, against imprisonment, against robberies/robbers, apothecaries, archers, bakers, barrel makers, boys, brewers, brides, captives, children, dock workers, fishermen, grooms ,judges, lawsuits lost unjustly, maidens, merchants, penitent murderers, newlyweds, old maids, parish clerks, paupers, pawnbrokers, pharmacists, pilgrims, poor people, prisoners, sailors, scholars, schoolchildren, shoe shiners, spinsters, students, penitent thieves, travellers, unmarried girls...

... some say he is even the patron saint of prostitutes (this is down to the legend of him depositing wedding dowries into the household of a poor man who could not afford to have his daughters married... and who without the generosity of Nicholas would have watched helplessly as his children were forced into prostitution to avoid becoming destitute).

As you can see that's quite a list and it is by no means a complete one.

St. Nicholas of Myra - from an image in my home town church.

I've often joked at this time of year that seeing as Nicholas is the patron saint of unmarried girls/women desirous of marriage that such women need look no further than me on this day, if they want an answer to their prayers.

Well he is my namesake... you can't blame me for taking advantage of the fact.

However, this year I really want to try and do something real - something higher, nobler and to the point of why Nicholas is celebrated. Unlike Nicholas I don't have a vast supply of wealth at my disposal to drop down people's chimneys or through their windows, but there is one thing of worth I *can* do...

So here it is:

Have another little peek at that list above. Do you fall into one of the categories above? Do you know someone else who does? If that's you, please comment below or message me using the contact form and I as a Nicholas and non canonical saint will pray for them... or you. I don't care how long the list gets, I'll do it. I'll assume the mantle... I will be St. Nicholas - just for the day... and who knows if I can show some discipline, maybe even longer.

Coincidentally tonight as I write this, reports are coming in of a cargo ship sinking in the North Sea with the loss of four sailors and seven still missing at sea. I think prayers for all involved in this unfolding tragedy are a perfect place to start.

So the only question I want to ask is:

• Can I pray for you?

The Hardest Prayer

At church this week we were looking at prayer as our main subject matter; it lead me to reminisce on some thoughts I have had in the past on what I think is perhaps the hardest prayer you will ever pray, and I felt inspired to write these down and share them with you in a line-by-line analysis. So what is this prayer?

It is nothing less than the Lord's Prayer.

We say it every Sunday and many of us know it off by heart; I wonder though, how many of us slide into familiar patterns with such ease that we fail to resist the temptation to just phone it in. If we stop and examine it... maybe it will give us cause to take a step back and think about what it we are saying every week:

Our Father in heaven:

Right from the very start, just two words in and already we have made our first bold assumption - we have acknowledged the presence of an omnipotent God and summoned him to commune with us. Not only this, but we have dared to presume a relationship (however factual it may be through out adoption in Christ), with this almighty God... you have declared that he has a paternal bond with you.

Hallowed be your name:

We have acknowledged that God is holy and knowing ourselves to be imperfect and prone to unholy behaviour, that too is an audacious thing to do... something that requires us to acknowledge the truth about ourselves and compels us to prostrate ourselves in humility.

Your kingdom come:

Here we are calling on God to usher in his Kingdom - to call time on these "shadowlands", to end the imperfect tenancy of man's reign on Earth... and establish his reign in the new creation. In theology we  are taught that the kingdom is both "here"   and "near", that is to say that while we live as Christians, the values of God's Kingdom are present and alive within us as the Church... but that this is just a deposit and the full realisation of the Kingdom is just around the corner... awaiting the fullness of time. In the ultimate sense, when we pray this part of the Lord's Prayer... we are calling for nothing short of the end of the world (not in a cataclysmic sense... although the Bible teaches that cataclysmic events are the birth pangs to this)

Your will be done, on earth as in heaven:

Here we affirm that we are subservient to God. When we pray this line with an honest heart we are saying that whatever our will is, whatever the things we desire are... we are willing and prepared to submit them to God's divine plan and that we would rather see his heavenly will and design for our life and in the world around us... than our  own selfish desires.

Give us today our daily bread:

Interesting that phrase isn't it? Bread is a staple food... it's the basics, a food we fall back on when our banquet table isn't full (if we even have a banquet table). What we are effectively saying to God is that however much we think this life owes us, however much we feel we are entitled to or wish to satiate ourselves with, we are willing to only receive what we need... admitting that the things that we want are not necessarily as important to us as the things that we need... and sacrificing them for our own spiritual well-being.

Forgive us our sins as we forgive those who sin against us:

Now we come to the really big stuff... and in fact our church service books have let us off a little lightly in my opinion. Here's how the Gospels render that line:

"And forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors."

Matthew 6:12

"Forgive us our sins, for we also forgive everyone who sins against us."

Luke 11:4a

So in Matthew's Gospel the past tense is used, whilst in Luke's Gospel a universal approach is required. In other words we are not to put limitations or criteria on when we forgive or who we forgive. Jesus is quoted in Matthew 5 as commanding us to be reconciled with those we have quarrels with before making an offering to God... and time and again there is the warning that if we don't forgive others, we ourselves will not be able to receive forgiveness because of the bitterness in our hearts. It is therefore clear that our willingness to forgive others must be paramount when we pray this prayer... and who those others are has no exceptions. whether it's the pettiest slight or the deepest grievance, we have to set aside our own desire for retribution and leave it in God's trustworthy hands.

Lead us not into temptation; but deliver us from evil:

Here we acknowledge that we are not in control of our lives and are susceptible to the many distractions and pitfalls that life has to offer us. We admit that we aren't always the best judge of the situations we find ourselves enveloped in.  As much as we love our independence as human beings, we confess that we are not qualified to self determine the best path for our lives. As much as our independence matters to us... we are calling upon God to direct us away from the harm that we find ourselves lured into. In Homer's Odyssey, there is a point where Odysseus and his crew need to navigate past the island of the Sirens; there's one problem - anybody who has heard the beautiful voice of the Sirens is irresistibly lured to their death on the island's rocky shoreline... where they are devoured mercilessly by the Sirens in their true form. To escape this fate, Odysseus orders his men to put beeswax in their ears and to lash him to the main mast in order that he can hear their song without dying. The plan works but Odysseus nearly rips himself apart trying to get to the island because confined as he is... his urges are too overwhelming. I've always found that a useful parallel for this part of the Lord's Prayer. We know that there are harmful things that are out there for us... seeking to devour us, often they wear a pretty face or have strongly desirable qualities.  In the times we find ourselves unable to block out the fatalistic lure of these competing desires... when we are either unwilling or unable to block out their appeal with the equivalent of beeswax, we need to call upon a power that will keep us lashed to the mast even when we scream and cry out in desperation to be sent to our deaths.  We need humility and courage to do that... and this what our appeal to God here is about.

For the kingdom, the power, and the glory are yours now and for ever:

We set aside all personal sense of ownership and hierarchy in the universe. We admit that God is sovereign in all and over all... and we reject the desire to to supplant him in our daily lives.

Amen.

Really? Amen is a hard word to pray? You might not think so... but let me throw another element into the equation.  In the book/film The Princess Bride, the farm boy Westley keeps uttering a phrase every time Buttercup asks him to do something - "As you wish". But Westley isn't merely stating his willingness to comply with Buttercup... he means something deeper:

 

When Westley says "As you wish", he actually means "I love you". Can I challenge you to rethink what we mean by "Amen" in a similar way?  The word Amen translates in English to something like "so be it" or perhaps if you are in to Star Trek it could also translate to "make it so". Isn't that the same as "as you wish"? Shouldn't it mean the same? Rather than just saying that we comply with a prayer or simply confirm the desires expressed within prayer... couldn't we, shouldn't we actually be meaning "I love you"?

Just some food for thought. I'm sure there have been or will be hard times in people's lives where a specific prayer of the moment has been immensely hard (if you would care to share it, please do). I don't mean to belittle those experiences at all... what I'm driving at is that this is a general prayer, one we've all grown up with... and yet we fail to recognise the power and the meaning in the words we utter. In fact that's a charge that can be laid at our door for other things like the Creed... but that's a topic for another time.

• What prayers do you find the hardest?
• What do you think about the Lord's Prayer?

#Vigil2012

A few nights ago, I had an odd moment of inspiration.

I decided to pull into church on my way back from work. This is not something unusual or extraordinary in itself, I often drop in on the way home, to find a moment of respite and quiet to gather my thoughts... and pray for the church's development for a few minutes.

However while I was there on this occasion, my mind drifted towards what different people do in Lent. I'm not a great person for giving things up, for which I have my reasons (I think if you are going to give something sinful up, you should do your best to give it up as permanently as possible... and not just for 40 days; I also believe fasting is something that should be enacted out of personal conviction as and when needed and not enforced primarily by the liturgical calendar).

However, there's one thing I do that if the weathers holds out, I cherish doing every year. On the night of Maundy Thursday, I travel to the edge of town and I sit and meditate for a while... usually about an hour. My method has evolved over time but my reasoning and purpose have always remained the same.

You see I'm very mindful of the moment in the Gospels where Jesus found himself emotionally isolated from his friends, due in no small part to their weariness:

"They went to a place called Gethsemane, and Jesus said to his disciples, “Sit here while I pray.”  He took Peter, James and John along with him, and he began to be deeply distressed and troubled.  “My soul is overwhelmed with sorrow to the point of death,” he said to them. “Stay here and keep watch.”

 Going a little farther, he fell to the ground and prayed that if possible the hour might pass from him. “Abba, Father,” he said, “everything is possible for you. Take this cup from me. Yet not what I will, but what you will.”

Then he returned to his disciples and found them sleeping. “Simon,” he said to Peter, “are you asleep? Couldn’t you keep watch for one hour? Watch and pray so that you will not fall into temptation. The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak.” 

Once more he went away and prayed the same thing. When he came back, he again found them sleeping, because their eyes were heavy. They did not know what to say to him.

Returning the third time, he said to them, “Are you still sleeping and resting? Enough! The hour has come. Look, the Son of Man is delivered into the hands of sinners."

Mark 14:32-42

Jesus prayed alone in Gethsemane

Knowing that God is not bound by time, I like to try and do my part... to keep watch for one hour. To think, pray and meditate about Jesus... in support of Jesus while in the past he is wrestling with his emotions in the garden. The very first year I did this, I went inside the local church to do it. However as I walked back home at about 3am (I was far more hardcore about it then), I decided to pause for a final moment of reflection in the park. It was then that one of those unique moments of magic that we so often miss if we are not alert to them, occurred. The church clock struck three times and over on the hills bordering the town, I heard a single lamb bleating.

That one moment defined the whole experience for me and gave me cause to try whenever I could to repeat the exercise al fresco. Following my time on the geographical Gethsemane, I went a step further and took to meditating on a hillside overlooking my town. Doing this has given me added insight because there is no light except that which you bring with you. Every noise you hear could be an animal or suspicious farmer wondering what on Earth you are doing. Every time the occasional car headlight sweeps past you from afar, you feel very exposed. These emotions have added to the experience for me... the psychological discomfort and insecurity they breed, help me to feel in a very small way, that I am sharing a minute glimpse... a microscopic  deposit of the kind of emotions that may have been with Jesus that night, many years ago.

The reason I'm bringing this up now and not merely at the time I do it, is because this year, I feel I'd like to encourage others to do something similar. This is why I've given my post a Twitter hashtag for a title. I am hoping to drum up a little support for the idea by using the hashtag #Vigil2012.

I don't imagine in a million years this is going to go viral or global... but it's something special and meaningful that I have appreciated over the years, that I want to be able to help others to discover and share in themselves.

I do appreciate that people have family commitments and in some cases a trip out into the wilderness might be inadvisable and dangerous. Do what you must to make it work for you in your personal circumstances... go in a group, or use a small room or open church, but spend the time however brief... and you won't be disappointed.

So spread the word with #Vigil2012 and if you do get involved, please let me know how you get on... I would be genuinely interested to know and share in your experience.

Blessings

Nick

The Hippocratic Prayer?

Recently I've been contemplating the need for Christians to be more responsible in their handling of others, especially in matters that are deeply personal. I have in the past been the recipient of well meaning intentions that have had detrimental effects on me and it has occurred to me that too often we find a solution to a problem that seems to work for the many... and mistakenly assume that it is a panacea.

We must remember that every one of us is individual... what works for 90% of people may not be beneficial for the remnant.

If we take medicine for example.... even something as wonderful as penicillin has it's limitations, for those who are allergic it is not a wonder drug... it is a potential death sentence (I say this secure in the knowledge that I am among that minority).

Whilst watching elements of Pope Benedict XVI's state visit to Britain, I caught with interest something a commentator said with regard to Cardinal Henry Newman. It was said that Newman was a strong advocate of the idea that you could not truly help  a person unless you took the time to know them. In this matter I agree with Newman (the irony is not lost on me). Sometimes a person's needs are obvious... on other occasions there are hidden factors influencing those needs. If we spiritually "dish out the pills" without knowing our "patient", we run the risk of harming them and even vicariously, those they know, in a variety of ways.

While pondering these things my mind wandered onto ideas in culture (both factual and fictional), where a doctrine has been established whereby those who adhere to it, pledge to a pattern of behaviours that protects the people with whom they come into contact.

The three immediate examples that occurred to me were Asimov's three laws, the Star Trek prime directive and the Hippocratic Oath taken by doctors. It's the latter of these three that I decided to focus on. The oath was originally set down approximately 2,400 years ago in classical Greece. In its original format it invoked the names of various Greek gods, but over time it has been adapted to suit the needs of various Western cultures that have inherited Greek ethics.

A representation of the Hippocratic Oath in the shape of the cross.

In more recent history, a motion has apparently been put forward suggesting that  code in the same spirit as the Hippocratic Oath be set up for those who work in the area of scientific research.

So this left me wondering if perhaps I could adapt the oath for a more spiritual context. Obviously the New Testament frowns upon the idea of taking oaths... but that didn't stop me thinking that perhaps the oath could instead be set down instead in the form of a prayer. So after some deliberation and wrangling I came up with an initial draft prayer:

Father God, I ask by your grace and the Holy Spirit's power for the strength to fulfil this covenant:

I will respect the hard-won spiritual gains of those brothers and sisters of the faith in whose steps I walk, and gladly share such wisdom that you have blessed me with, with those who are to follow.

I will apply, for the benefit of others, all measures [that] are required through prayer, scripture and counselling, avoiding those twin traps of overtreatment and therapeutic nihilism.

I will remember that there is divine grace in fellowship as well as the call to righteousness, and that warmth, sympathy, and understanding may sometimes outweigh the need for discipline or the words of rebuke.

I will not be ashamed to say "I know not," nor will I fail to call on the prayers or assistance of other members of the Church, when the skills or wisdom of another are needed for the restoration/reconciliation of those you call me to help.

I will respect the privacy, rights, individuality and personal needs of those who confide in me, for their problems are not disclosed to me that the world may know. Most especially must I tread with care in matters of life and death. If it is given to me by your grace and power to be help to save or preserve life, all thanks. But it may also be within my power to damage or destroy a life through my own fallen nature; this awesome responsibility must be faced with great humbleness and awareness of my own frailty and need of divine grace. Above all, I must not play at being God, for you alone are God.

I will remember that I do not treat a statistic in society, or sin itself, but human beings broken by sin, whose problems be they physical, psychological, emotional or spiritual may affect the person's family and economic stability. My responsibility includes these related problems, if I am to care adequately for them as an ambassador of your Son.

I will prevent myself and others falling into sin whenever I can, for prevention is preferable to cure; always remembering however, that God's grace is sufficient in all our weaknesses and is able to save us whenever we stumble.

I will remember that I remain a member of Christ's body, with special obligations to all my fellow human beings, those who appear sound of mind, body and soul as well as the broken and crushed in spirit.

Lord, help me to maintain this covenant, that I may enjoy life and art, be respected while I live and remembered with affection thereafter, that I served you and was an inspiration to others. May I always act so as to preserve the finest traditions of my calling and may I experience the joy of teaching, encouraging, healing and restoring those who seek my help for as long as it pleases you to enable me to do so.

I ask this in the name of your Son, Jesus Christ.

Amen.

I know it is fairly long... but I wanted to capture each element of the oath and ascribe it to a different aspect of the Christian walk. I'd be grateful for additional input on this. Is there anything in there that seems a little theologically out of step or perhaps too strongly worded or irrelevant. If you have any suggestions or alternatives, I'd be very interested to hear them.

A Different Vigil

As you may or may not know, on Maundy Thursday, I have in recent years had a tradition of visiting the church in my home town and sitting there in prayer for about an hour or so.

I do this in gratitude for what I believe Jesus did for me, because I like to try and give a little bit back. Knowing that he had nobody with him 2,000 years ago as he knelt and prayed with the weight of destiny and the knowledge of what he must suffer on his shoulders; I can't help but feel a sadness that his best friends couldn't keep their eyes open just for a while. So with this very much in mind and knowing that God is eternal, I go... to pray for Jesus in Gethsemane in the time leading up to his arrest, even though I know what happened. It's not that I think I'm anything fantastic, I do it completely as a response to what he first did for me.

However, having been to Israel and sat upon the Mount of Olives... I am now acutely aware that churches are perhaps not the best place to do this. Jesus did not go to the temple. Jesus went to the hill that looked across to his city, and watched over it as he prayed.I wanted to connect to that notion a little better. So last night, I changed old habits. I very nearly didn't, if the weather had been inclement... I would have abandoned the notion.

At about midnight, I took a torch and backpack and headed out to Primrose Hill. As you may know from previous Easter entries, this is the hill that every year blooms with a 30ft daffodil cross.... and this year is no exception (although the daffodils have bloomed even earlier and are know dying... and their number was somewhat diminished due to people sledging in winter).

I gingerly hopped across the A46 dual carriageway as Royal Mail lorries thundered past me deep into the night. Making my way along a bridle path, I eventually found the field that led to the hill. As I was now pretty much off the beaten track, I was quite anxious. Despite the presence of the moon, it was quite hard to make out entirely where I was going. I didn't know what critters were out there and my deepest concern was being discovered by some shotgun wielding angry farmer demanding to know my business at midnight... there was the loud sound of a gate rattling, it sounded as if someone had discovered me... but nothing came of it.

So it was that I found myself sitting above the crossbeam of the daffodil cross, illuminated only by the moon's pale light... and looking down upon the streetlights of the sleeping town of Alcester.

It was a moving experience. I really didn't feel alone. I had a great sense of God's presence as I prayed over the town... and for the historical event I was commemorating. I think it was more poignant and relevant for me to be able to do it this way. I eventually left the hill at 1am and made my way back into town. I did stop off and spend some time in the church, but being out there on the hill, really gave me a deeper appreciation and sense of "being there".

Having said that, being on a hill in the middle of nowhere is a little intimidating... especially when you aren't sure you should be there.

I am of a mind to do this again next year... but I'm seriously thinking of gathering a few brave souls to join me.... simply because I feel more could be done with a few more people.

Sorry I've been absent, had a few things on my mind lately... and for those of you who have access to the Inner Sanctum part of my blog, I may expand more a little on said things.

I have had a blog brewing for some time and I hope to post it very soon, however until that time... have an incredibly blessed Easter. Whatever you do with your time, I pray the peace of Christ that was won for us at great cost on that first Good Friday will fill your hearts and minds.

Back

I've been silent for some time... but far from idle.

I've been away at Scripture Union Camp but have since returned. To be honest I'm still gathering and processing my thoughts in the aftermath of what I perceived to be an extremely powerful week. I've had plenty of sleep since getting back... first night home, I slept 13 hours straight (more or less). I think I'm having trouble adjusting to my adrenaline levels returning to normal, as I still feel like a lump of lead.

Strangely,many of the people I have been away have come down with some kind of stomach bug... and I've noticed a lot of the people around me are in need of a friendly ear... so I'm not going to waste my current state of wellness.

Returning to the "real" world has been quite harsh... it always is when you have been in your element, the emotions that are churned up again raise the questions of "who or what are you?" and "what are you going to do?"

It's especially hard when you have a natural affection for many of the people you meet and work with, particularly when it's with God's people and expressly and exclusively for God's purpose. There's a lot to pray about at the moment... but I want to sign off tonight, by thanking those who have known my movements and have kept me in their thoughts and prayers... it was most definitely appreciated and noticeable.

May God bless you all.

N

Go to the Correct Source

Yesterday's post was quite angst ridden... and rightly so, given the position I felt I was in. I make no apology for that.

However, I didn't just sit and brood over those feelings... I took them to church and decided to wrestle them through with God. When I got to church I was greeted by this little lady:

A bedraggled spaniel who had somehow gone off on a misadventure after escaping her owner. She had clearly been through the River Alne several times... not to mention several hedges backwards. It was a seemingly random encounter... but I later remembered that I had felt a similar way just over a year ago... and I had written the following "parable" in a blog:

Once there was a dog who liked to play fetch. He would often go up to the children in the churchyard with sticks or balls. All he wanted was for them to throw something out for him to chase after, to show a little friendship and affection... yet all the boys and girls would ever do is ignore him, shove him away or abuse him by beating him with the sticks he had brought... all this merely because they either didn't want him around or just didn't understand what he was really about. Yet despite his bruises the dog never gave up hope that he would be accepted for who he was.

I thought it was at the very least interesting that God should cause me to have an encounter in the "real world" that would remind me of that.

Anyway, this morning's reading was a real challenge for me:

"One Sabbath, when Jesus went to eat in the house of a prominent Pharisee, he was being carefully watched... ...When he noticed how the guests picked the places of honor at the table, he told them this parable: "When someone invites you to a wedding feast, do not take the place of honor, for a person more distinguished than you may have been invited. If so, the host who invited both of you will come and say to you, 'Give this man your seat.' Then, humiliated, you will have to take the least important place. But when you are invited, take the lowest place, so that when your host comes, he will say to you, 'Friend, move up to a better place.' Then you will be honored in the presence of all your fellow guests. For everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, and he who humbles himself will be exalted."

Then Jesus said to his host, "When you give a luncheon or dinner, do not invite your friends, your brothers or relatives, or your rich neighbors; if you do, they may invite you back and so you will be repaid. But when you give a banquet, invite the poor, the crippled, the lame, the blind, and you will be blessed. Although they cannot repay you, you will be repaid at the resurrection of the righteous.""

Luke 14:1, 7-14

It wasn't easy for me to hear that... especially the second bit, given the way I've been feeling over the last couple of days. However, I believe I understood the point God was making - it was totally in line with what he was saying to me the other week... I think we were just "reading the next chapter".

I can't put my friendships on such a level that they come between me and God. Now you might think that is harsh but I think God is just helping me address an imbalance caused from how I used to live my life. Until my late teens, I shut myself away from others by letting them think I was a different person to the real me. It was very important for me to keep people at a distance - I wanted to be liked, but not loved. I created an elaborate labyrinth of "Excalibur tests" for people to negotiate if they were truly to be worthy of knowing me.

You might think that was pomposity at it's worst...but actually it was down to my insecurities.

Of course I soon learned the error of my ways... when people weren't interested in knowing me on a more intimate level... because they thought I was just a random likable idiot who just goofed around a lot. People saw me more as a pet than a person I reckon... and since those times I've devoted a lot of energy into trying to prove their misconceptions wrong... probably too much energy.

So, I feel that God was pulling me up on that, reminding me that even if the people I care about aren't always going to be there for me... He will always be there for me. Spurred on by this, I decided to take it up in prayer with a couple of other people.

I am ever so grateful for that... because my strengths were listed in prayer through others and reaffirmed for me in my heart by God... and though I did not ask for it, it was prayed that people would actually realise my genuine value both as a Christian and a human being. I felt a lot more at peace... and when I got home, I realised that a couple of minor things - straws that broke the camel;s back... had been answered.

So I think I can draw a line under this particular episode...but I hope I have provoked people to value their friendships - past and present... and to not take them for granted.

One thing I have to be watchful of though is how I seem to be under constant fire from different angles. It seems every fortnight I've had some great big boulder to wrestle with... it's just encouraging that for once, I seem to have taken them to the right source in the first instance...not as a last resort.

If anything in your life is causing you to wrestle... I pray that God grants you the wisdom to take it up with him.

God bless

N

PS... please pray for a friend of mine who I have not heard from in about a week, the last I heard... she was feeling very depressed and I am growing concerned. Though I only know her through the Internet I am considering calling her up.

Thank you.

A Prayer for the Dying

By the time you read this post, a close friend of my family and a good man of God, will have had his life support ventilator switched off. Richard went into hospital earlier this week to have a benign tumour removed... sadly all did not go well.

Last night, there was a gathering of many townsfolk in the church. They gathered for one reason and one alone... to lift Richard - our friend and theirs, up in prayer.

We first knew him through his role of choirmaster and church organist... and he quickly endeared himself to our family and the people of this town with his wonderful eccentricity and his zest for life. They say it takes a generation - 20 years, for the traditional folk of Alcester to truly accept an "outsider". If there is truth in that statement, then Richard was surely the ultimate exception. I would argue that he was perhaps Alcester's favourite adopted son. People knew him for different reasons - be it through his profession as a music teacher, or his involvement in the church... but everyone loved him for the same reasons.

In more recent times, Richard married and joined the clergy. He didn't really take many of the services at my church, in fact I believe I only managed to attend one service he took at Great Alne... but what a service it was. You could say many things about his preaching and leading style... but the one thing you would never be able to say... was that it was boring. Everything was magnificently manic and full of life.

I'll always remember the Alpha Course session he led, on the nature of good and evil. He dressed up in old school props to demonstrate the full armour of God. He used a bent fencing sword, a dustbin lid and an old air raid helmet amongst other things. Everybody in the room was in stitches. Yet, just 5 minutes later he recited a heart rending true account about the aftermath of a bombing raid. He described the carnage, the pain and the grief... and the whole room was in agreement with him about how terrible it was. And then he asked the people in the room - most of whom were old enough to remember... just where they though these events had taken place: London? Birmingham? Liverpool? Coventry? No... it was Dresden. I loved that moment because he affirmed everything I believe about good and evil - that we as humans often view evil subjectively... we fall into the trap of assuming our country is unquestionably correct on most matters, because it is "cultured" and democratic, but really you could call it a form of nationalistic arrogance. It was good of Richard to pooint it out... as only he could. To be honest, I don't think anyone else could quite have got away with it.

That was Richard to a tee. He never took himself too seriously but always made sure the seriousness behind the message came across. He always left the stage leaving people with something to chew over... but never gave it to them in a painful manner.

And so this blog entry is my tribute to him... my prayers go out to his family and friends... and I hope, if you feel willing or bold enough... that yours will too.

Father I give thanks for your servant Richard. I thank you that he has touched many lives in the brief time he was with us. I pray that you welcome him into your loving arms... a good and faithful servant. May you keep his family safe in the palm of your hands, by the power of your Holy Spirit. May they be comforted in their hour of need. May the seeds that were sown through Richard, not fall on barren soil. May the hearts that heard him speak your Word... respond to it.

May he be remembered on Earth... and welcomed in Heaven.

In the name of Jesus

Amen.

As a tribute to Richard, who was both a man of music and man of faith; I have provided a link to a piece of music on YouTube which made me think about him this week. It is an orchestral rendition of music from The Mission. I feel it is appropriate as it is both bittersweet and victorious. One of the main characters - Gabriel, is a Jesuit priest who clearly loves music, as he plays an Oboe. His character made me think of Richard... and the mix of music and belief, felt very appropriate in remembering Richard. If you have a few minutes, follow this link.

The Vigil

I have a little personal tradition that I carry out each year, one that I'd like to share with you... but first, to get things in context, let me refer you to a familiar story:

Gethsemane

They went to a place called Gethsemane, and Jesus said to his disciples, "Sit here while I pray." He took Peter, James and John along with him, and he began to be deeply distressed and troubled. "My soul is overwhelmed with sorrow to the point of death," he said to them. "Stay here and keep watch."

Going a little farther, he fell to the ground and prayed that if possible the hour might pass from him."Abba, Father," he said, "everything is possible for you. Take this cup from me. Yet not what I will, but what you will."

Then he returned to his disciples and found them sleeping. "Simon," he said to Peter, "are you asleep? Could you not keep watch for one hour? Watch and pray so that you will not fall into temptation. The spirit is willing, but the body is weak."

Once more he went away and prayed the same thing. When he came back, he again found them sleeping, because their eyes were heavy. They did not know what to say to him.

Returning the third time, he said to them, "Are you still sleeping and resting? Enough! The hour has come. Look, the Son of Man is betrayed into the hands of sinners. Rise! Let us go! Here comes my betrayer!"

Just as he was speaking, Judas, one of the Twelve, appeared. With him was a crowd armed with swords and clubs, sent from the chief priests, the teachers of the law, and the elders.

Now the betrayer had arranged a signal with them: "The one I kiss is the man; arrest him and lead him away under guard." Going at once to Jesus, Judas said, "Rabbi!" and kissed him. The men seized Jesus and arrested him. Then one of those standing near drew his sword and struck the servant of the high priest, cutting off his ear.

"Am I leading a rebellion," said Jesus, "that you have come out with swords and clubs to capture me? Every day I was with you, teaching in the temple courts, and you did not arrest me. But the Scriptures must be fulfilled." Then everyone deserted him and fled.

Gethsemane is by far one of the most moving moments in history. Jesus Christ - knowing what fate is about to befall him, went to the Mount of Olives to pray. He took his closest friends with him, but they fell asleep. Another close friend comes along and betrays him... then when the crunch came... everyone abandoned him to his fate.

Yet despite all this... and despite the fact that he could have easily escaped (even from the Mount of Olives which is pretty big), he chose to stay.

He chose to stay.

For you and for me and for his Father... he chose to stay.

Something personal I like to do on Maundy Thursday (the day the Church calendar remembers the events just described), is to take a walk after midnight, through Moorfields Park:

I like to do this because when I was a child, I used to imagine it happening there... it was so real to me, I could point out different parts of the park and tell you where everything took place.

After this I travel through Bull's Head Yard, on my way to the local church:

It is along this alley that as a child, I used to picture the soldiers and guards dragging Jesus off down after his arrest. Curiously... it's the same run down set of buildings that I used to imagine the nativity might have taken place in.

Eventually I come to the church... by which time, it is about 12:30am. Nobody is usually around.... just me and God. What I try to do while I'm there, is to try and "be" with Jesus... albeit some 2,000 years too late. I just feel that he did so much for me... that the least I can do, is try to pray for him and "keep watch" with him in those few precious moments between the Last Supper and his arrest... the moments of despair and loneliness that he must have felt. Yes, I know it's silly. I know that in the human way of thinking... asking for something that has already happened is pointless. However, there are just two things that I would say to counter those arguments:

• I believe God is not bound by time... a prayer after the event, in good faith... is better than none at all.
  
• My love for God... forged on the basis of his love for me, requires me to treat him with a closeness that only the sincerest of friends and family deserve. If you saw your mother or father suffering, you'd want to help them... so why should it be any different with Jesus?

Eventually (sometimes it's 30 minutes later, sometimes an hour or so), I come out of church and return home via the route I came. I usually sit in the park for a few minutes and try to picture it all over again. Then I get as much sleep as I possibly can, before joining the March of Witness in the morning... where I usually look a little like a zombie, after having stayed up so late. In fact, having stayed up so late... just to share this with you... bed is where I should be going. So that is my little tradition. My hope is that it might get you thinking about what thoughts went through Jesus' head and heart that night... and to encourage you to appreciate them a little bit more.

God bless

N

A Harsh and Delicate Balance

"The spirit is willing but the body is weak."

Jesus said it to his apostles in the Garden of Gethsemane. It summarises neatly how we feel when we know the way, but are uncomfortable with going the way.

Paul later wrote:

"For the sinful nature desires what is contrary to the Spirit, and the Spirit what is contrary to the sinful nature. They are in conflict with each other, so that you do not do what you want."

More or less the same thing, said in a different way.

Why does it have to be this way? It always seems that temptation comes, only when your heart is getting right with God. It is a rhetoric question. I know the answer to this, but I ask anyway... because it is also a heartfelt plea.

The answer is that when you are not following God, when he is not in pole position, you are not an active threat to the enemy's schemes... so why should he waste valuable resources on you? However, knock your idols off the throne and put God back as numero uno... and the story is very different.

Recently I have been inwardly positive, I currently feel that the things that have had a hold on my heart in the past are now not so much of a priority. Yes I want to achieve/receive those things, but I feel a lot more inwardly patient towards them. Yet, shortly after this realisation came, temptation soon followed along in it's wake. It takes various forms... what it can't control on the inside it will distract on the outside. It seems to get more fervent with age as well.

Honestly, that is where I am... it hasn't helped that my bible notes went missing a week or so ago, so I have found it harder to focus on God (that's an excuse, I know... I could always spend the time praying instead, but this is one area in which i benefit from a little discipline). Thankfully they have shown up now, so I hope to be in a better position shortly.

I decided to jot this down in case there are any other people who feel the same way... so that you know that we all have our cross to bear. Jesus knows all about it:

"Because he himself suffered when he was tempted, he is able to help those who are being tempted." Hebrews 2:18

If you are willing, you could pray for me... it would be appreciated.

May God bless you and if you are reading this and having struggles, post your name or if anonymous you can type help... and I shall pray for you in yours. OK?

Is the Bad News Over?

So police have arrested a man - Tom Stephens, over the murder of 5 prostitutes in Suffolk. I have been praying for a swift and accurate resolution to the case since the middle of last week.

I only hope they've got their man.

Earlier the BBC were a little lax with the story and published it on their website with the name, age and photograph of the man held, citing their source. If the man turns out to be innocent and released... what might the BBC say in their defence if the man receives pages and pages of abusive messages on account of their faux pas?

As yet I appear to be the only person who has picked up on this error. I just re-checked the story. They appear to have put the aforementioned image back up now.

My guess though is that the police would not have named him if they weren't confident that this was the man they were after.

In unrelated news, hopes of a resolution to the investigation side of Baby Lilly's death have been raised after the police arrested, questioned and subsequently bailed a South Warwickshire woman on suspicion that she had concealed a birth. Lilly herself rests in peace in Great Alne, at the church I attend. Sadly, it turns out that a 16 year old girl has admitted giving birth to another baby and concealing the birth... resulting in a police search of a quarry in Worcestershire. Twice in one year - this is terrible!

However in all these cases, it would appear that an end is in sight and for that we must be grateful. I will continue to pray about the Suffolk murder enquiry until I feel certain that police have brought the inquiry to a successful conclusion.

Pest Control for the Soul

Things are starting to stir at church at the moment and it is quite exciting. We may be just a ragtag band of regulars, but there is a sense that God's promises - made so long ago... are back on the horizon.

In my earlier blog of two weeks ago, I mentioned that there was a sense of solidarity at the funeral for Lilly (incidentally, people are still coming to the church and laying flowers on her grave), and I have to wonder if this was merely a foretaste of things far off.

I used to pray for big things in timid ways, but I've been convicted of that recently. I should be a lot bolder and last week i decided to put this into practice. I trudged the 2.5 mile trek to church and prayed that God would feed us with his Spirit. I doubted not.

The service was immensely powerful... as we sang "Come, Now is the Time to Worship", a storm passed directly over the church and when the song finished there was an almighty clap of thunder... but that isn't the only thing I heard, I heard the word "COME!"

When you get an invitation from the Almighty, you don't mess about. Since that time, there has been an increase in prayer among people at church... and I personally have felt God's p[resence much more strongly. This is the time. I get the feeling that the dinner bells are ringing and the doors are opening. This is when the people of God have to come back and start eating the banquet... because they need to be ready for what is coming afterwards. Dare we hold back and remain in the playground any longer... letting the gracious meal provided for us go cold? Dare we?

Today's bible reading came from Joel 2:21-27:

"Be not afraid, O land; be glad and rejoice. Surely the LORD has done great things. Be not afraid, O wild animals, for the open pastures are becoming green. The trees are bearing their fruit; the fig tree and the vine yield their riches. Be glad, O people of Zion, rejoice in the LORD your God, for he has given you the autumn rains in righteousness. He sends you abundant showers, both autumn and spring rains, as before. The threshing floors will be filled with grain; the vats will overflow with new wine and oil. "I will repay you for the years the locusts have eaten— the great locust and the young locust, the other locusts and the locust swarm— my great army that I sent among you. You will have plenty to eat, until you are full, and you will praise the name of the LORD your God, who has worked wonders for you; never again will my people be shamed. Then you will know that I am in Israel, that I am the LORD your God, and that there is no other; never again will my people be shamed."

I've spoken before about how I believed God would do that for me personally, as well as the church generally. The autumnul rains have now both literally and metaphorically begun and God is raining down mercies upon me. Pest control is now firmly in place. My locusts are being severely culled and my personal harvest is being restored.

A scripture was laid on my heart all through Wednesday:

"A righteous man may have many troubles, but the LORD delivers him from them all"

Now I want to point out here that I only consider myself righteous through the grace of God... there is nothing in myself that is deserving of having that title bestowed upon me. I want to put the emphasis on God here... because I've had that passage on my heart before... and I believe God was this time telling me that he is making good on that promise... and so I credit him and him alone with the glory.

I have decided that I am going to keep a financial record on this blog, once a month to illustrate to you... just one way, how this is going. I've always maintained an open door policy towards blogging. If something is going horribly wrong... I tell you... if however God is performing wonders... I tell you that too!

So here we go:

Current debt: £3,100+ interest
Current Status: 12 months to final payment @£310 a month.

The first payment comes out on November 2nd. You will receive an update then!

Alcester, A Spiritual History

On Monday night, I travelled around my town with Harry, his mother Suzi and Pat Newbold. Our intention was to pray for the town, as most people accept that it is a "stronghold" ( a fortress for spiritual powers that oppose God).

I know that other places that are strong in darkness often turn that way because of some terrible wrong done in the distant past. I decided to map out the spiritual geographical history of Alcester... taking into account both history and legend.

The town was founded in Roman times - Alcester means encampment on the Alne (river). The modern day church sits at the centre of the (then) walled section of the Roman town. I believe it is highly likely that the church sits on top of an old temple. During the civil war, the church was desecrated and used as a stables for parliamentarian warhorses. There were claims that a church vicar fraternised with and protected highwaymen many years ago as well. Not far from the church is the town hall. In the middle ages, this is where the town's preaching cross was situated (before a strong church presence was established). According to legend, the town was cursed by St. Egwin. The townsfolk would not listen to him and tried to drown him out with their own clamour. It is said that an earthquake split the ground and swallowed up the blacksmiths who jeered at Egwin. The town lost it's prosperity at that time.

The town hall is also a place of meeting for verious masonic lodges in the town. For reasons I don't want to get sidetracked into talking about here... Freemasonry is dodgy... VERY dodgy.

So already, without having walked 100 metres from the town centre... there is already a lot going on historically that could carry spiritual consequences.

Moving on down the town and we come to Bleachfield Street. Recent excavations discovered some kind of ritualistic infant burial... and in latter days, the towns ancient Roman fort has been found. Bleachfield Street has been the site of two murders. In my father's and grandfather's days, the road was known as "Blood and Thunder Street" on account of the number of fights that broke out up that road.

Finally on the outskirts of town, there used to be an abbey. It was commissioned in the time of King Stephen (not one of England's finest rulers it has to be said). At the time of it's construction, a monk named Anselm spoke out against the king. Naturally kings don't tend to be fond of this kind of behaviour... and Anselm was set upon by assassins. With his dying breath Anselm cursed the town and pronounced judgement on the king. Stating that England would one day lose authority over the prinicpality of France.

As you can see, Alcester has a colourful past.

This was the motivation of the prayer walk. There was very little peace as we prayed, but that did not diminish our resolve.

While we were in Bleachfield Street, Harry was asking in prayer something like for Alcester to be something like Jerusalem in the time of King David; this made me think of how David captured Jerusalem's fortress in the first place (2 Samuel 5:5-9). We also prayed over the location of the Roman fort at the far end of bleachfield street. At that time I saw a picture of a large white limestone block. It was a new stone. At this time I'm not quite sure what that is about. I can only think of a couple of scriptures that relate to it. Isaiah speaks of it it in chapter 28... and Peter quotes him when talking of Christ. There is also the promise of a new stone as a gift from God to his people in Revelation.

This needs prayer and discernment. I am encoraged however, because it wasn't just an outward praying experience. This time, I believe God said something too. Now it is merely a matter of understanding it.

No easy task.

For an alternate account of the prayer walk... please check out Harry's blog, where he briefly touches upon it. you can reach it by following this link:

http://spaces.msn.com/members/happyhairy/Blog/cns!1pYIiTbd6GVC7t8ZtDiiM1kg!728.entry

Confusion Reigns

I'm supposed to be going on a prayer walk with Harry tonight. He feels burdened to do something like this for the town.

In the meantime I've been playing merry havoc with the townsfolk. Nobody here noe knows what time of year it is. I decided as a direct proportionate response to the presence of trick or treaters, that I would play out Christmas carols on my car stereo.

In all seriousness, I think that would be a positive way of handling things like Hallowe'en. Instead of moaning about it, go out there and sing praise songs.... and HAND OUT sweets and candy to the houses who open their doors to you. It revereses the polarities and gives people something to think about, whilst not being aggressive or killjoy about anything.

Well, I say that... but I can see this ending in a stand-off between skeletons and choirboy's. My money is on the boys in cassocks... I mean come on, in case anyone forgets anyone who is in a boys choir is a Soprano!!!!!!

I'm secretly enjoying being the mystery Christmas Kid... who patrols the town!

HO HO HO!!!!!

A Response

Author's note (05/01/07) The following post was initially a response to a comment left on my MSN Space. The person leaving the comment had been abusing my space by posting obscenities. I deleted the pure abuse, but when he finally got round to raising a valid point, I decide to be curteous. It seemed to pay off as their was a genuine dialogue that lasted for a couple of posts:

In response to:

"no offence but stop wastin ur life!! if god exists then howcum such bad things happen to gd ppl?? god dosent exist gt it through tht thik skull of urs!! my grandad died of cancer no matter how much prayer i went thru and church servises i went to. he died!! sure god exist. yeh and monkeys mite flie outa my butt!! jesus roks he was a rly old dood hoo live a mmillion yrs ago get the hell over it!:@:@"

Firstly, I want to make one thing very clear. Despite the fact you posted this in "Abusive Comments Part 2", I don't consider a large part of what you typed as offensive, the rest I believe comes from hurt. So, I'll treat it your post with respect and respond accordingly..

I naturally sympathise over your loss, but with all due respect, you need to get some perspective. You are not alone in knowing people who have suffered died from cancer. Several of my uncles and aunts have as well. Many years ago, I had an aunt, uncle and cousin who died in a car crash... leaving two cousins orphaned. This broke my grandparents hearts. My grandfather died of a heart attack that very year, and my grandmother was a shell of herself for the several years she lived on. My grandfather on my mother's side died before I was even conceived, I never knew him. I would encourage you to be grateful for what time you had with your grandfather, rather than be bitter over what you have lost.

People who have a belief only because they think it's some magic charm to protect them from life's trials need to grow up. As human beings living in a fallen world, we all suffer, that much is clear. In fact, if you have a faith in Christ Jesus, you are likely to come in for more. Jesus only promises to not let us be exposed to more than we can hack. He doesn't say you are immune to pain. Though he is a balm for suffering and the ULTIMATE cure for our fallen condition, he is not an inoculation against the circumstances of this world. How can Christians be a witness to those suffering, if they themselves have not suffered?

No, apart from our need for salvation, the other reason Jesus suffered, was so that he would be able to help us when we ourselves suffer. By his wounds we are healed!

We need to lean on Jesus all the time, not only to get us through the bad times, but also to acknowledge him in the good times.

I'm assuming your comment about Jesus was hyperbole, because as we know, he only lived two thousand of our Earth years ago. He also was NOT a "rly old dood". Most people believe he died around the age of 33. That's not old... at least i hope not, or I'm in BIG trouble LOL! No, Jesus died young... and that's how he remains. He was raised in a resurrection body (some people think that means scientifically changed at the atomic level). He does not age, and he is not on Earth anymore. so yup two millennia later he's still in his thirties. Lucky bloke... but then he is God! :-)

I'd like to challenge you to pray again, though hard it be. I'd also like to ask you something if you do. When you pray, do you just talk, or do you listen as well. I'd like to encourage you to take that path, because it makes a difference. I'd also encourage you to pray along with people who have experience. no, I don't mean people who read from a text book, I mean people who pray from the heart.

Finally, to those of us who do believe in Jesus, a warning:

"That servant who knows his master's will and does not get ready or does not do what his master wants will be beaten with many blows. But the one who does not know and does things deserving punishment will be beaten with few blows. From everyone who has been given much, much will be demanded; and from the one who has been entrusted with much, much more will be asked."

And:

"These things happened to them as examples and were written down as warnings for us, on whom the fulfillment of the ages has come. So, if you think you are standing firm, be careful that you don't fall! No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it."

If we seem to be having an easy ride, we should always be ready and prepared for God to use in difficult situations/circumstances.

We have been entrusted with much, lets not be lazy with it!

N