The White Stuff!

For the past two days, it has been snowing in the land of Alcester.

It has been so long since snow has fallen in abundance in my town. Firstly, it's in the centre of a valley, so we only get a light dusting. Then of course we have climate change to contend with. If the people of Britain had any doubt the climate was changing, they only need look to the Mr Whippy vans that have been out in Stratford-upon-Avon serving ice cream from January.

So, substantial snowfall is rarer these days. I always remember with fondness, the time when there was a blizzard on Christmas Eve. I was a child at the time and we had to walk all the way to the midnight service at Arrow. That was many years ago, before the bypass was built... before the Elephant Tree was cut down. I dragged my handmade ply wood sled all the way up and back again. The snow was deep, so deep... and my sled was no use at all.

That was probably 25 years ago now... and yet people talk of snow, like it never happened over Christmas. Maybe they just haven't noticed winter gradually getting thrown out of whack.

Cold, snowy days like this always remind me of my childhood. The gentle crunch of virgin snow beneath the boot. The huddling of the family round the radio as we listened to BRMB (there was no Warwickshire radio station then), to find out if our school had been closed... and the exultant cheer that followed when we discovered it inevitably had.

The way I see it, when days like this come... you can either be extremely mature and sensible... and bemoan the delays in travel, as well as the disruption to adult life... or you can recapture your youth, get out there, have snowball fights and/or build a snowman or some other effigy.

Guess which way I jumped?

I ran out the door taking a few tender and gentle steps on the new covering of snow, and then I ran and jumped for joy in the street. Now at 7.15, this is not something that is in my nature... but the snow had energised me and I ran amok with excitement.

I walked to the High Street to await my lift for work. I got bored so I decided to build a snowman outside the Post Office. I only got halfway up the torso before I had to leave. Once at work, it quickly became apparent that not many others would make it and most people left once official word had been given. I stuck it out till 4, trusting in Rob's judgement.

Sadly when I got home, no trace of my snowman remained. He'd been kicked in. I had hoped someone would have understood what I was doing and finished it off. Unfortunately though, it seems a lot of people are more destructive in their nature than they are creative. We need less of that sort of human.

Today I have the day off from work... I haven't ventured out yet... but it is still snowing.

Truly there is beauty in all God's seasons.

Walking Tall

It appears I am growing in more ways than one... or at least if that's not true, then the world around me appears to be shrinking.

At first I dismissed it out of hand. My head brushed on the light strip in the kitchen at work. In the past I'd need to slightly raise myself to do that, now it seems I have to duck slightly.

However, tonight I went Rob and Susan's house. I did the usual 45 minute work out routine (otherwise known as being chased by the kids and returning the favour), but when it was time for Benji's bed time he asked "Who is bigger... Daddy or Uncle Nick?" He asks this every now and then, and sometimes he means age not height.... on this occasion it was height. So Rob and I stood back to back... we used to be about the same height... Rob having a slight edge... now I am about half an inch to an inch taller.

Is this even possible? Can fully grown adult men have a second bout of growth spurts? At 32 you'd think the only thing that would be growing would be hair, toenails, ears and nose (the latter two continue growing throughout life... which leads me to wonder if I'll look like Dumbo in 2050?).

Am I a mutant or is my metabolism playing up? Are we all mistaken, or is there a medical phenomenon where some adults start growing again?

I did have a thought that perhaps this is something to do with my new found confidence and rediscovered sense of self worth. Maybe I'm just standing straighter, walking taller... and this has led to my apparent vertical expansion. The flaw in this is that Rob and I have stood back to back, straight as a rod before... so the difference shopuld have been noticeable too

Your thoughts and comments on this... half baked, off the wall or even medically sound; are as of course always welcome.

Debtwatch 4

I can't believe that I have just passed a quarter of the way towards the original timescale for paying off my debts... and yet I am over halfway towards paying them off.

I only managed to hold onto £100 from my last payday, which was disappointing. I'm hoping I can keep my belt tight and breathe in this month and keep at least £200 back. I have £200 in savings and I will have made my usual target of £300 next month. As I said last month though, my intention is to put down £500-£600 down as it will seriously bring me a lot closer to home.

All the same it is encouraging to know that by the beginning of March I will be down to a three figure sum (heck if I really wanted to go crazy I could fast for a month and put all my wages in to cross the finish line... that is how close I am).

It is very exciting to think that come May I could be building for my future.

God has been very good to me indeed.

Balance left on debt: £1480.79
Cash in short term savings reserves: £200
Cash left in current account that I hope to spare for debt repayment £200.00
Estimated balance for next Debtwatch report: £700
Original Finish Date for completion of Payments - October 2007
New Estimated Completion of Payments - MAYDAY!

Blog Snobbery

I've been noting with interest the rise, fall and apparent demise of the experiment that was 2000 Bloggers.

The short story version of it was that a bloke called Tino decided to take a snapshot of the blogosphere, a sort of first come, first serve scrapbook. The fundamental idea of his project was to showcase 2,000 blogs - warts and all. The more established great and the good, alongside the humble offerings of novices... the interesting eye catching blogs, alongside the mundane everyday ones.

Unsurprisingly perhaps, this began to throw the link valuing system into a little bit of chaos, causing less established blogs to gain ground on the big guns.

I can understand how this can sometimes be a bad thing, the people who would be most likely to look for these sort of projects and exploit them, would be entrepreneurs, viral marketeers and corporate bloggers... and we all know how tedious and annoying those blogs often are (when I use traffic exchange programmes I always filter out business and marketing blogs).

However, I've noticed in the comments of some of the detractors, an air of snobbery and ego. They fear that an increase in ranking terms for the lowest common denominator will damage their readership and will dilute the purity of the blogosphere. In effect what they are saying is "You can't come up here! You aren't good enough, aren't professional enough, aren't intelligent, humorous or insightful enough to join us in the ranks of the elite!"

It's hokum. Worse than that it's a form of electronic fascism. This is not the Roman Empire, we are not divided into patricians and plebeians. We are together, an online example of global diversity.

Don't misunderstand me, there are some wonderful blogs out there... important ones too. Blogs that expose the political machinations of corrupt governments, blogs that seek to expand human understanding between different cultures... and many of these are wonderfully researched.

When it comes to my blog, I have no delusions of global takeover. My hope is that over time, people will be touched by the things that I write about. I don't care if I'm of the moment or on message with the topics of the day, that's nice... but it's just a bonus. What really matters to me is if somebody finds my blog on a search engine in a decade and is touched by something I wrote say... last year, then as far as I'm concerned I've done my job. All I seek to do is pass on what I have learned, or share joy and pain in equal measure... in the hope that future readers may know that they are not alone.

I believe that blogs should be allowed to stand and fall by the quality of their content and not by their reputation or press. If that means that a new kid on the block starts making inroads into the readership of the heavy hitters, simply because they get lucky with a few links and establish themselves, so be it. This happens all the time in nature, the dominant male of many species community groups eventually gets toppled by some upstart, it is the way of things. Similarly how can the saplings in a rain forest grow, if the big trees don't fall down every now and then, leaving a gap in the canopy?

I'm not completely against protectionism with regard to the blogosphere, I just feel it should be like the Galapagos Islands. We protect it from the outside interference of those who are intent on changing it's nature... but when it comes to the natural development of what people blog about and who sets the agenda, let the people decide. If they see something of note, then they will comment on it, link to it and spread the word.

Have faith in the fellowship of bloggers.

Subtle Changes

I'm starting to believe it... I'm changing.

Had some news in the week, that clearly indicated a door had been closed to me. I could have moped on... "woe is me", with regard to my situation, goodness knows I've done that often enough. I surprised myself by being OK with it and taking it in my stride. My attitude towards closed doors has changed. In the past I'd be frustrated, that every door I tried would be firmly locked. A phrase keeps going through my head, that seems to be keeping me afloat:

Every decrease in possibilities brings about an increase in certainties.

I don't think I've read that anywhere, but it fits how I feel like a glove. You see chess master Nick Payne would be probing each one of those possibilities until the stars failed in the night sky.... but I'm learning that the things I don't need on my journey, won't take root within me. I don't have to second guess what might be or what might have been, because only that which is certain will come about.

The good thing about this, is that I'm not missing as many "moments". You know what I'm on about, the small things in life,... the little blessings from God, the things of beauty that just slip quietly by into the night if we are to busy to notice them.

Tonight I was walking from work, to meet up with my mate, it was about 5:35pm and the sun had not long set. About halfway down Henley Street, I heard birdsong. It was so loud, proud and beautifully clear that I tracked it to it's source. there atop a chimney stack, was the silhouette of a tiny bird. A tiny bird with such a loud and expressive voice. I just had to stop and take it in.

A slightly more disturbing twist in my new positivity, is that I'm singing a lot more at work... but I'm also a lot more relaxed and motivated, so even if my colleagues disapproved of my voice (which they don't), they have plenty of reasons to remain chipper.

I look in the mirror and my face doesn't seem as heavy... and I know I'm smiling a lot more.

Now for the crazy part. This next bit probably won't make sense to most of you.

I get the strangest feeling that the scar on my chest is a bit smaller... or at the very least thinner. I feel like I'm growing less conscious of it... and some form of healing is definitely under way. whether that is purely psychological, spiritual or also physical remains to be seen.

It doesn't matter, God is good and he is taking me into calmer waters. We'll have to see how this develops.

God bless


Nick

Every decrease in possibilities brings about an increase in certainties.