Tuesday, March 20, 2007

Unfettered Joy!

I've been thinking a lot about opportunities, threats, strengths and weaknesses lately and have come to the conclusion that some important changes are going on in me as a person.

In just merrily bumbling along in life, hoping for all the things I wanted... I very rarely looked over my shoulder and contemplated on what I already had. Always with my eyes fixed on the road ahead... I neglected many times to just consider where I was.

For one reason or another I've been thinking about my status in life - 32 and single... but you know what?

SO what!

I'm finally starting to appreciate the freedoms being single affords me... and yeah, maybe I want to settle down... but the Lord gave me these freedoms for a purpose and I'm not ready to surrender them just yet - because I haven't really used them or explored them as I know I can. Nor have I just let my hair down and relaxed around people as I know I want to. In private, I need to start flexing my spiritual muscles and train for what is ahead of me. In public, I need to learn to play.... to just have fun as I am... and not get encumbered by serious relationships that at the present time I don't really have time for.

I was thinking of a quote from a Spider-Man comic this afternoon:

Are you the man who dreamed of being a spider? Or the spider who dreamed of being a man? Are you the one... or are you the other?"

In fact the quote is actually in turn, based on one from the Chinese philosopher Zhuangzi:

One night, Zhuangzi dreamed of being a butterfly — a happy butterfly, showing off and doing things as he pleased, unaware of being Zhuangzi. Suddenly he awoke, drowsily, Zhuangzi again. And he could not tell whether it was Zhuangzi who had dreamt the butterfly or the butterfly dreaming Zhuangzi. But there must be some difference between them! This is called 'the transformation of things'.

Now looking upon those ideas literally, they seem silly. However i had a revelation today. there comes a time in a Christian's walk when he must decide for himself:

Are you the man of God who dreams of being a man with a normal everyday life... or are you the man with an everyday life, who dreams of being a man of God?

I thought I was the latter... but more and more I'm confronted with the realisation that I am the former. That isn't to say that Christianity requires the total rejection of all the things we desire in life... but it does require that they be laid on the altar as a willing sacrifice.

There is the old Star Wars philosophical joke: As a boy you want to be Luke Skywalker.... as a man you want to be Han Solo (boys want to do fancy Jedi tricks and have a light saber, men want to get the girl).

I've always wondered why you couldn't have the light saber and the girl. Maybe you can... and maybe one day I will; but for now, if I can serve God better with a "saber and Jedi powers", than I can running off with princesses, then I can do without. If I have to be a monk rather than a scoundrel then so be it. I'll happily take Gas Meter girl for a coffee if she should happen upon my complimentary email... but it ain't the end of the world if nothing comes of it. Yeah I want to bounce my own kids on my knees one day... but that is the bonus... not the sole purpose of my existence.


  1. Anonymous11:15 am

    He will bring the right woman to you at the right time! Too many marriages, even Christian ones, end because we would rather have someone, anyone, than to be alone. Aloneness has value, also.

  2. Jillbeth hit it on the head there (see my latest post).It's all too easy to be driven by the need to to settle down and hear the so-called ticking of the clock (slightly more relevant to ladies but....). It's important to appreciate where you are now and what look forward to what may be. Sounds like this revelation came at the right time for you which is great news. Enjoy where you are now and live without regret!

  3. Hey guys, that was the point of my whole post.

    I'm actually enjoying being alone, thanks though!

    God bless


  4. Anonymous2:27 pm

    Hi Nick. Being 34 and single, I can look back and see where I've come from, look around and see where I am , and peer into the future with goals and aspiratons. My status in life? I think I'm growing up! :)

    I would say the "transformation of things" is from the child of God to the man of God (although always a Son!).

    Thanks for sharing your insights, I'm blessed when I visit your blog.


  5. Whoops,hope you didn't think I was being condescending, Nick.It certainly wasn't meant like that. More agreeing with your sentiments and enjoying being in the moment.

  6. "Are you the man of God who dreams of being a man with a normal everyday life... or are you the man with an everyday life, who dreams of being a man of God?"
    --I like that question. Maybe I'm more the former too.


    nice "meeting" you, so to speak...


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