April Fool!

So in case you didn't realise, Sunday's article was a complete hoax. Hands up guv, it's a fair cop. A jape. A prank... APRIL FOOL!

April Fool!

This is what happens when the only church service you have on certain Sundays is put on at some ungodly hour which you miss.... it leaves you waking up with time to kill and unfortunately the Devil makes work for idle hands.

Basically I was thinking about my habit of subverting whatever random event Google has commemorated on Good Friday in the past by using it and turning their randomness back into a commemoration of Good Friday. It was then that it occurred to me. Why not do the same thing for Palm Sunday and April Fool's Day... after all, how often are they going to fall together in our lifetimes?

Although the entire article was a complete fabrication and the story itself was absurd enough, here are the humdingers that should have given it away:

1. Alhmar Dhryh is fictional. It is phonetic Arabic that translates to "Ass Shrine".
2. The Hebrew inscription פתי של האחד באפריל translates as "April Fool's Gullible".
3. The researcher I quoted (Prof. Ol Ali), is an anagram of April Fool.

In addition, the photograph of the excavation site was ripped from somewhere else in the Middle East and the photographed remains of the wall fresco is actually an image of some prehistoric cave paintings. Finally pray tell, what are the odds of such a story being timed to come out on Palm Sunday? Isn't it just a little bit convenient.

So congratulations if you dodged the bullet and saw through my little plan... and I won't reveal who included a reference to my post in a sermon on the same day - you know who you are... and your secret is safe with me. :)

However perhaps the last laugh is on me. When endeavouring to explain my elaborate ruse to a couple of colleagues at work, one of them was pretty insistent I should get suited and booted with a dog collar and join the clergy.

*Cue awkward silence in the office*

Time for you to share: 

• What April Fools tricks did you play on people?
• Were you caught out by anybody else's tricks or jokes on Sunday?

Palm Sunday Archaeology - A Timely Discovery

Archaeologists working in the Holy Land are reported to have made an astounding discovery in a tiny village located in the Palestinian West Bank, not far from Jerusalem.

The scientists were investigating in the area and looking for evidence of early Christianity near the settlement of Alhmar Dhryh. Having excavated many metres down in the ground, they uncovered remains of what appeared to be an early first century Christian chapel. What they stumbled upon amazed them and has the potential to revolutionise our understanding of the way early Christians may have worshipped.

The excavation site in Alhmar Dhryh

Many of the walls have not been very well preserved, but on one it is clear to see that there would have once been a fresco covering the entire surface area. The recurring design appeared to be based on palm leaves which would have once been a vivid green, although the passage of time has caused them to fade and discolour.

Faded wall paintings of palm leaves.

The archaeologists worked their way to the rear of the derelict church and eventually found a broken altar and a focal area of worship. What they discovered next, proved to be the most curious and controversial find.

Hidden within a recess in the centre of the altar was an ossuary containing what appeared to be crushed skeletal remains. The ossuary was marked with the following Hebrew inscription:

פתי של האחד באפריל

It was clear that the remains of whoever was inside this container, were of great importance to the Christians of first century Alhmar Dhryh. Scientists took the bones away for chemical and genetic analysis and were astounded to discover that the remains were not human but in fact belonged to a species of Middle Eastern donkey. Subsequent carbon dating tests have confirmed that the donkey would have been alive some time in the first half of the 1st century AD.

It is thought that the church was abandoned and fell into disuse shortly before the Romans put down the Jewish Revolt.

The chief archaeologist Prof. Ol Ali explained in a press conference on Thursday: "Remarkably, the nature, location and dating of these finds puts them tantalisingly close to the Gospel account of Jesus Christ entering Jerusalem in the first century BCE. Could it be that early Christians held reverence for the beast that carried their master into Jerusalem? Perhaps... I don't know. For many people, tactile contact alters our perception of things. Touch can connect you to an object in a very personal way, make it seem more real. Perhaps having been touched by the Christ, the donkey became elevated in a way we can scarcely imagine happening today and was regarded as an object of worship."

Did early Christians feel a special connection to the donkey that carried Christ?

The release of these auspicious findings, timed almost perfectly to coincide with Palm Sunday (the festival which Christians commemorate Jesus' triumphant entry into Jerusalem), are sure to leave experts scratching their heads for many years.

Perhaps Jesus knew more than he was letting on when he chastised the Pharisees for silencing the crowds on that day:

“I tell you,” he replied, “if they keep quiet, the stones will cry out.”

Luke 19:40

After all... isn't making stones cry out unspoken history what archaeology is all about?

A Wrong Turn?

Today, for those of you who don't know, is Palm Sunday.

It's the day that Christians around the world celebrate Jesus' triumphal entry into Jerusalem on the back of a donkey.

I tell you... what I wouldn't have given for a donkey myself, this morning. My journey to church was a little more of an obstacle course than usual; my usual 2.5 mile walk was almost blocked in two places by floodwater. Fortunately I was able to find my way through, precariously balancing on a grass verge, whilst looking out for inconsiderate 4x4 drivers many of who just plough through deep water with disregard for other road users/pedestrians. I think I must have been the last person to be able to get through on foot.... had I been any later, I'd have been cut off.

The Triumphal Entry marks a peak in Jesus' journey... at least in terms of public popularity. He'd just pulled off an amazing feat - bringing a man (Lazarus), back from the dead, who had been in the grave long enough for decomposition to set in. If you read the Gospels, that is when the authorities decided he was trouble and needed to be killed. Don't you think it is odd that it is when good people are at their most radical, that people conspire to remove them?

Anyway little of this seemed evident to the crowds on the day. They were full of religious fervour and zeal for the upcoming Jewish festival of Passover. Jesus, with Jerusalem set firmly in his sights... seems to pull an Obi-Wan Kenobi routine and acquires his transport for the day. He later apparently repeats the same trick in getting booked in to the Upper Room (note to self, Jesus is very handy for getting late bookings).

Then Jesus started to ride into town. Crowds who have either witnessed his miracles, heard his teachings, or merely caught wind of rumour about this mysterious teacher/prophet from Galilee... get worked up into a frenzy and start praising God. They start waving random bits of tree, or throw their clothes on the floor. It was one big party.

This was a glimpse of glory. Jesus is giving this people a veiled chance to understand who he really is. He isn't riding a warhorse, he is riding a donkey. He hasn't come to make war with Rome but to make God's peace with man. However people get caught up in events without fully understanding them. Jesus had experienced this before and was no stranger to it... but it never failed to move him:


"As he approached Jerusalem and saw the city, he wept over it and said, "If you, even you, had only known on this day what would bring you peace—but now it is hidden from your eyes."

Luke 19:41-42

And then it happens.

While the crowd goes wild, Jesus(from their perspective) makes a wrong turn... and the crowd hold their breath... stunned.

If Jesus is a potential Messiah... why is he heading towards the Temple? Why isn't he heading towards the Roman fortress? Perhaps he is going to say a prayer before driving out the Romans...

...but then the unthinkable occurs.

Jesus starts throwing his fellow Jews out of the Temple Courts. Furniture flies everywhere, doves disperse wildly into the sky and coins spill out onto the floor. Desperately, men dive to the floor to save their precious gold from being scattered.

Suddenly this man's agenda is not what they once thought. Their safe idea of what Messiah meant...has been turned on it's head.

Who is Jesus? Why is he really here?

We might know the answer to that question now. We may have a relationship with Jesus. However, I wonder... how many "wrong turns" has Jesus made in your life? How many times have you invited God to work in your life... only to fond he then has gone on to do something radically different to your expectations.

It can be hard sometimes... but this is at the very heart of the battle for the human soul. God is sovereign and part of having a relationship with him involves the hard choice of letting him do things that sometimes we will find uncomfortable. It is what in the final analysis defines who we are... do we obey our fallen nature and go our own way? Or do we accept that there is someone who is bigger than all of this... someone who cares for us deeply, wants the best for us despite ourselves... and knows what is best for us... even when it contradicts our own understanding of what we desire.

That is ultimately the BIG question you have to ask (not necessarily in words). In a smaller way we ask that question when we enter any meaningful relationship - is knowing and loving this person, worth the risk of anything they might do to hurt me?

With God it is different and a whole lot bigger. In him there is no wrong... and he can be trusted even when it hurts... especially when it hurts.

Are you willing to accept him?