Peace for Lilly

Today marked the funeral of tiny baby Lilly: the little girl who was found in the river not far from my church.

I went.

I've never been to the funeral of any child before... let alone a child I've never had any direct contact with.

Nonetheless... I went any way.

I didn't go to gawp morbidly at the tiny white coffin... nor to jump on some sympathetic bandwagon. I went because at the core of my being I fundamentally believe that everyone has the right to have someone say goodbye when they pass away. Every individual counts.

Furthermore, I also believe in my heart of hearts the command that Jesus Christ gave us... to "love your neighbour as yourself". I would not wish to be left alone - unloved and forgotten, should my time come... so why should I leave another to the same fate?

"Love your neighbour as yourself".

Lilly was not afforded the kindness that stems from that commandment in life. Instead... either by accident or brutality, her collar bone and skull were fatally fractured shortly after birth and she was abandoned out of either fear, callousness or neglect in a section of river off the beaten track.

However... in death, the local community resolved to give her the respect and love that she had been robbed of in life.

Lilly had a Christian burial, paid for out of love by kindly locals. Her white coffin was tenderly carried in the gentle loving arms of a local undertaker. Flowers were laid, a headstone will be provided... and 100 mourners turned out to say a loving goodbye to a girl they never knew... I am so proud of the people around me on this day... today - for all their flaws... they got it right in the most amazing and powerful way.

A few moments will stay with me this day. Firstly, a young mother held her own child in her pew just 10 feet away from where Lilly's coffin lay. The contrasting image was not lost on me. Two children... two very different fates, life and death at so tender an age in such close proximity... it moved me.

Secondly, we were invited to pray over the coffin... all of us... to raise our hands and pray - to let God's love, light and peace flow out from within us as a gesture of farewell to the child.

Thirdly as the coffin was led out, several women reached out to touch it. I'm told this is not an unusual custom... but I've never seen it at any of the numerous funerals I have attended. The tactile sympathy shown towards this child warmed my heart.

Fourthly, the internment itself was supposed to be private... but nearly everyone stayed and watched from a distance... and paid some kind of personal respects when they found opportunity. This was only slightly marred by the press taking snapshots of the burial taking place... which sickened me.

What moved me most was the having sensation of the unseen mourner - God himself, all around me. I felt the Holy Spirit in that service... and their was a Spirit of unity among those gathered.

So rest in peace Lilly, you will not be forgotten... you will always be one of us.

A Chance Encounter with Sadness

It was an ordinary if hectic day yesterday; exhausted from working extremely hard I arrived at my car where Rob was waiting... I started the car and set off at the helm expecting nothing more than the usual Friday routine of friendly discussion regarding theology and events within our circle of friends. At that point in time the only thing bothering me was the fact that I hadn't had opportunity to say hello again to that girl from the estate agents I'm quite fond of (it's the girl I'm fond of... not the estate agents).

Unbeknown to us, things were about to take a darker turn.

Driving back along the country road, I turned off taking note of the signs warning us about a horse ride taking place that day... a minute or so later, on approach to a narrow S bend by a weir, I saw a different sign - "POLICE SLOW". On approach I assumed there had been an accident in the road ahead.

Rob and I cruised gently through the narrow gap between the roadside and two police cars and wondered what it could be that was so wrong? It couldn't be a car accident because there was no debris or wreckage. Whatever it was was significant because there were two television crews on the scene as well. I hypothesised that it was either a cache of drugs or in the worst case, a body that had been discovered.

I didn't know how close I was to the truth, and I wish now that I hadn't been. Rob doesn't normally watch the news and he had wanted me to text him to let him know what it was, but in the end.... I didn't have the heart to do it, the news was too grievous for me to pass on like that.

I asked Mum and Dad to turn on the news and it was then that I learned the awful news that a newborn baby girl, sealed in a Mothercare bag was the source of the investigation. She had been found in the river by a family of walkers... how terrible they must have felt.

Autopsy results on the child reveal that she was delivered fulll term... but whether or not she was stillborn or died of other causes is as yet unknown.

Police are making enquiries after the mother... they are naturally concerned as to her physical, emotional and mental wellbeing at the moment. Despite the fact that the babe was found near Great Alne, just a stone's throw away from where I go to church, the police are stating the discovery as being in Aston Cantlow... they must be assuming a certain amount of drift from the nearest large settlement.

I hope and pray the mother turns herself in and that she can get the help she needs. I pray things don't have to turn any darker with this story then they already have. I just hope it is a case of the mother not being able to get to medical help and suffering from a state of confusion and post-natal depression after finding her newborn child had not survived. It sounds strange to hope for the least worse possibility, but I'd rather not entertain the thought that this was an act of wilfiull neglect or cruelty.

One mistake I believe the police made when issuing the press statement, was getting a man to deliver it. they should have asked a female officer to make the appeal... preferably a mother herself. If this lady is to turn herself in, I feel it will be to empathic arms and not authoratitive ones.

Pray for the mother, whatever she has done.... pray for her.

N